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[Page 4] CONTENTS Cover Acknowledgments Foreword 1. WHAT DRAWS ME TO PEOPLE? Understanding the qualities you enjoy in others 2. WHAT DRAWS OTHERS TO ME? Understanding what people like about you and why 3. HOW TO BE CONFIDENT WITH PEOPLE Learning to feel comfortable with others 4. BECOMING A PERSON PEOPLE WANT TO FOLLOW Developing the qualities of an effective leader 5. MOTIVATING PEOPLE FOR THEIR BENEFIT Developing the art of drawing out the best in people 6. HOW TO BE A PERSON PEOPLE RESPECT Understanding the value of your character 7. YOU CAN BE AN ENCOURAGER Using your skills to inspire others to excellence 8. LOVING DIFFICULT PEOPLE Understanding and helping difficult personalities [Page 5] 9. HOW TO BE A PERSON WHO CAN HANDLE CRITICISM Learning to use confrontation as an opportunity to grow 10. BEING A PERSON PEOPLE TRUST Building integrity into your relationships 11. DEVELOPING A WINNING TEAM Learning how to help others become successful Extras [Page 6] ACKNOWLEDGMENTS This book is dedicated to the three congregations that I have been privileged to pastor. The Church of Christ in Christian Union Hillham, Indiana 1969–1972 Faith Memorial Church Lancaster, Ohio 1972–1980 Skyline Wesleyan Church Lemon Grove, California 1981–1995 These churches represent thousands of relationships that have molded me as a leader. It is from these experiences that this book has been written. The one truth that rings clearer than any other is … People don’t care how much you know Until they know how much you care. [Page 7] FOREWORD One of the most important decisions I’ve ever made is to be a people person. Honestly, it wasn’t a difficult decision for me. I naturally love people and am attracted to them. But I also have to say, I’ve worked at improving my people skills. When I was growing up, I knew that I was going to become a pastor, and that meant that I would be working with people every day of my life. My father knew this too. He is a pastor. Because he understood the power and importance of being good with people, Dad helped me to start developing those skills while I was just a boy. He coached me. He gave me books to read. And by the time I had graduated from high school, he had taken me to two Dale Carnegie courses to learn how to win friends and influence people. My father also modeled great people skills to me. What makes that especially impressive is that unlike me, he is not naturally a people person. Where my temperament is very sanguine, his is melancholic. Where I am a natural optimist, his bent is toward pessimism. Yet he has taught himself to be both outgoing and positive. He continues to be an inspiration to me. If you are a believer in Christ, then you need to be a people person too. Jesus exhorts us to love one another (John 13:43). And the apostle John explains that if we truly love God, then